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Friday, 02 January 2009

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Noamaan Mohammed Khan

Salaam bro! It was just a matter of chance that i got to hear Abu Hamza for the first time on hard talk which is placed on youtube. I dont know this man, but he sounds good to me. Can u please tell me something about this person. I wud be pleased to hear from u!

ARGcomment: which Abu Hamza from where?

Rohima Begum

Dear Brother,

I would like to write about my experiences and let women in my position know that there is always hope in life and positivity after a marriage full of domestic violence.

I am 27 yrs young and have a son called Yasseen who is nearly six months now.

Right now I feel as though I could have never made more of an assertive decision than to have left my husband four months ago; having tolerated so much abuse that I had to break the pattern for my son's generation and I am greatful that I have left.

I feel much more happier as an individual now. I feel like I can breath and take in good air than air filled in an environment full of corruption.

I can sleep and wake up in the mornings and not have to cope with alcoholic breath and I can educate myself without the worry of avoiding arguments because I was not allowed to expand my mind.

I can now go on doing my Masters degree and laugh that he is not near to control it.

After suffering so many punches and kicks and crying non stop during my first pregnancy, some women will give up hope that they cannot trust any one again or never get married again becausse of the way violence shhatters women's existence but not I.

No one controls my existence, my mind or my spirituality unless it is the Qadar of Allah (SWT).

Why should I stop living life and allow my ex husband to think that he has won over the sense of my being and indivduality?

I still want to stand firm on ground, back straight, shoulders up, chin up and smile and pretend that nothing has ever happened because in reality it is not my loss.

I have been the best wife I can be in such extreme circumstances and I don't even feel like looking back.

I have gained and have been given by Allah (SWT) a miracle in my life - my son and I shall never be ungreatful for that, Insha'Allah.

Do I wish to get married again? Yes. I still want my rights as a Muslimah and I believe in myself that I will find happiness for us both because what happened in my life has made me stronger and no one can ever treat me as a walk over.

I now have been given a chance so I am going to make the most of it in my life and finish my education and become self employed before I get married again insha'Allah.

If there are sisters out there who are suffering in silence then all I have to say is respect Allah (SWT) and one of the ways to do this is to have respect for your own mind and body as well as your emotions. A slap can lead to being shot in the streets and that's fact.

Love yourself because this is the only life you have a go at and if you want to make a difference to society and future generations to come then love yourself first and that will give you the energy to grow to say no to sufferings.

I am also writin to you as I want your opinion on one of the contraversial topics namely sural An - NIsa, 34.

What would your advice be to those men who abuse women and what advice would you give to women in such positions.

In my opinion, there are not enough talks on domestic violence and I feel that it is a serious issue to discuss in conferences.

Aa many might not be aware domestic violence is not just about the physical abuse but the mental torture and financial control one is out through too. It is also about abusers isolating their partners from family and friends and controlling that individual.

My dear brothe, I pray and hope that you will publicise this post and advice according to this issue and educate those that use the Qur'an as an excuse for their immoral and unethical actions.

Ma Salamah,

Rohima (East LOndon)

ARGcomment: Well done sister. No one has to put up with such evil, or should. Make a stand! Even better put such men where they belong..in prison. As for what Allah has allowed under extreme circumstances that is explained clearly by the Prophet and limited in degree and circumstance. Any man who over steps the mark should be dealt with bythe law, which in a Shariah state is he is beaten as his wife was by him!

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